Laos Part III - Sah Bah Dee Bee Mai!

Here is the last installment for Laos - and as promised it is much shorter, with far fewer pictures.

A Day in Savannakhet – How Getting Soaked Earns You Beer Lao
Before we get into the day's adventures, here is a little bit about Bun Pi Mai Lao (Lao New Year’s). Nik had told us a little bit about what to expect – basically getting soaked. The Lao New Year is started by the three day Songkan festival, which is basically a three day nationwide water fight! Note that Thailand does this as well. In Laos they keep it pretty fun and under control – we didn’t see anyone get angry over getting doused and nobody went overboard so to speak (with the exception of some falang of course). I hear it is quite different in Thailand, as it is the most violent three days of the year in Thailand! I guess in Thailand you need to be careful who you are soaking. To be fair I imagine the festival in Thailand is mostly fun and ruined by a few rotten apples. Thailand also has cities with much more population than all of Laos, so there is more chance of bad tempers. Anyway, we had an idea of what we were in for, but you’ll get a better idea if you keep reading.

We decide that it is going to be a lazy day as we need it. So we sleep in and then decide to just walk around Savannakhet and not get crazy and try to see everything. Our hotel is a ways from the heart of the city so we decide to walk and see the celebration. There isn’t too much going on in the morning, although we see these guys getting their food ready by cutting up a goat (I think). I read about a “baguette vendor” in the LP and really want to go there and try it. I can tell that Margaret thinks this is going to be “one of those” trips, but she humors me. We walk to where we think it should be but are not sure which place it is as there are a few that look similar. Anyway I check the map and figure out where we are by the church near us and then figure out where we need to be and we find it. The lady doesn’t speak English and we are a little worried so we order on baguette with just cheese and some coffee. And then we kind of just check things out. I get a little braver and since the LP said they made amazing breakfast baguettes I point to an egg and ask her for another one. She scrambles the egg and then adds unripe papaya and then asks if I want sauce. Before I can say no she is lathering the sauce on – two different sauces – one hot and one not. And was it a good thing she didn’t listen to me. It was the BEST breakfast sammich I have ever had. Honestly it was heavenly. So good. Here is a picture of me devouring it (can you tell that it is hot out?) and a picture of the vendor.We then walk around Savannakhet, which is a crumbling old colonial city. It has a certain laid back charm to it and all of the kids are out celebrating. And everyone is so nice – many people in their houses or at big parties wave and smile and yell “Sah Bah Dee Bee Mai!” (Happy New Year) – a few of them motion for us to join them. So the water festival is basically people (mostly kids) hanging on the side of the street with buckets of water, hoses, water guns, etc. and soaking motorbikes, cars and people that go by. It is pretty relaxed in Savannakhet (although I feel sorry for the people on motorbikes) and we are able to remain pretty dry as we walk around. Savannakhet, much like Vientiane, is right on the Mekong (with Thailand across the river) and so we head down to the river to see if it is as wonderful as in Vientiane. And it is pretty nice. We relax with some Beer Lao and water. And of course see just about the cutest kids. We decide to check out the market next, and it is a little bit out of town so we jump in a tuk-tuk. And it is on the tuk-tuk ride that we get doused pretty good for the first time. I get it worse than Margaret although I wasn’t completely drenched. It actually felt really good. When you get doused, the kids that douse you will yell Sah Bah Dee Bee Mai! And we yell it back. I mean, how is that not the best New Year’s celebration anywhere? The market is huge, but there once again doesn’t seem to be much there that is very unique or very Lao. However, the market is not super crowded and it isn’t hot either, so I like it just fine. And the people are all friendly and really interested in us. We walk by one group that is partying and they hold up a pitcher of Beer Lao to motion us to come over and have a beer. But of course when we come over they pull out the buckets of water! And they are really funny because they are so shy about dumping water on me. They basically look at me and motion to see if it is ok – and then they pour water over me. But then I get a glass of Beer Lao! It’s like the best, a little water to cool you down and some Beer Lao to cool you down even more. Too good. Just check out the smiles in the pictures.After the market we took a tuk-tuk back into town – and this time we managed not to get soaked. We stopped for some soup at a little café and then decided to walk back to the hotel. We knew we would have to have a strategy in order to make it back without getting soaked, so we kept crossing the street to avoid the water. But then we came to an impasse: there were kids on both sides of the street. So we decided to walk by the older kids (college age) and hope for the best. Of course they weren’t going to let us pass without some New Year’s cheer. And they were definitely more aggressive about it, but still they hesitated to make sure that we were ok with it. Anyway – we both got doused and then they gave us some Beer Lao. They were hilarious – having the time of their lives. One of them spoke passable English, and most of the others knew a few phrases. They told us to sit down and hang out with them for awhile. So we did. And they poured us both big glasses of Beer Lao and as we were about to take our first sip we both got destroyed with water. Two buckets poured over each of our heads – soaked all the way through. And then they kind of paused to wait for our reaction. Margaret and I looked at each other, laughed and then yelled Sah Bah Dee Bee Mai! And then it was onto the Beer Lao! Have I mentioned how much I love Laos?

We then went back to our hotel to rest and relax. By dinner time we were zombies and decided just to eat at the hotel restaurant. We had to get up really early the next day to catch a bus back to Vientiane. We were thinking that we would be able to get a VIP bus – one that has AC, a bathroom and makes very few stops. We figured we had experienced the local travel and could treat ourselves to a little comfort. But it was not to be. We ask the manager of the hotel about the buses and if we can get a VIP bus tomorrow. He shakes his head and tells us no VIP buses in the morning, only one every night. The LP had listed morning VIP buses, but I know things change quickly in Laos. So we could have taken that evening’s bus, but we had already paid for the room, needed a good night’s sleep and didn’t want to take an overnight bus and end up in Vientiane at five in the morning. So we decided that we would go local again in the morning. The manager phones the bus company for us and gives me the phone – there are buses every hour starting at 6am. So we decide to suck it up and take the 6am bus. We ask the manager if he can get us a tuk-tuk at 5:30am. He just shakes his head and says 6am. We are confused, so he jots down the bus times and draws a line between 6am and 7am. And I have no idea what this means, but he just says 6am tuk-tuk. So we figure whatever, we’ll just take the 7am bus then. I am thinking that the manager just won’t get up earlier than 6am and that is why he won’t get us an earlier tuk-tuk.

Dinner was pretty good. When we walked into the restaurant there were no customers and the family was sitting around watching a huge flat panel TV (they also had a PS2). When we walked in they jumped up and all went to their positions. Three of them went to the kitchen, one brought us menus and another one went and turned on the AC (which we actually asked them to turn off as we were still chilly from being doused with water all day and the AC was blowing right on us). After dinner we had some Beer Lao in the room (we had bought a bottle opener at the market) and vegged out to some quality BBC news.

Back to Vientiane – Fancy Meeting You Here!, a Bus Chase/Race for the Ages and More Dinner Plans Gone Amok
We were up early again to get our 6am tuk-tuk. We dropped into the office at 6am, and woke up the manager who was sleeping on the couch. I imagine he spends most of his nights on that couch. He checks us out and gets another employee to go flag down a tuk-tuk for us. The ride to the bus station is short and we are dropped off by the bus to Vientiane. At this bus station though you actually buy tickets at the ticket office! So we get two tickets to Vientiane, about $5.50 each. The porter loads our stuff and tells us the bus will leave in about 20 minutes. And that’s when we realize that this is the 6am bus and the hotel manager wasn’t being lazy, he was trying to tell us that the 6am bus will leave between 6am and 7am, so no reason to get there right at 6am. I still feel like an ass for thinking that he was just too lazy to get up that early.

We are about ready to go looking for some food at the bus station when someone calls our names and who could possibly be there? Nik! And she is on our bus, at least for a couple of hours as she is heading to Tha Khaek to hang out with a friend for New Year’s. Nik tells us that she saw us yesterday, but was too far away to get our attention. Small town. Small world. We are in seats on the front of the bus – and it starts out as a comfortable ride. We chat with Nik for the two hours she is on the bus. When we get to Tha Khaek it is time for our final goodbye with Nik, and it is sad again.

We were also really lucky that Nik was on our bus, because this really annoying guy was also on our bus. He started talking to us before we boarded the bus and sat right behind us. It was very difficult to understand him as his English wasn’t very good and he was a really soft talker. But he kept tapping us on the shoulders and leaning his head over our seats and telling us things. When Nik was on the bus we could kind of ignore him and chat with her. But when she left, we were fair game. He kept it up for an hour or so after Nik got off the bus, including showing us a picture of this dam site he worked at and giving us his phone number so we could call him the next day. Um, yeah – right. And it was still New Year’s weekend – as we passed through villages kids on the side of the road would toss water at the bus. So we had to be aware and close the windows every once in awhile. Our bus porters got in on the action once as well – at one stop they filled up a bucket with water. As our bus passed a pick up truck our porter leaned out of the bus door and just drenched the people in the back of the pickup. It was smiles all around. One other thing I forgot was about 30 minutes into our journey our bus stopped at a village and no one got on. Our porter dashed out of the bus, went to a temple and came back with some flowers – the monks blessed them for good luck and safe travels, and we would need them.

We had stopped for a bathroom break out in the middle of nowhere. People filed off the bus and crossed the road where there were some trees for coverage. We had been in no hurry the whole day so far – in fact the bus wasn’t very full when we left and when we went through villages our driver went at a crawling pace to see if there were any possible passengers. But while we were pulled over for the bathroom break another bus passed us. And then things changed. All of a sudden there was a sort of panic and the bus driver started honking at people to get back on the bus. I was outside waiting for Margaret and they motioned me on the bus. I kind of shrugged my shoulders at them and waited. Margaret and another woman finally emerged and started across the road, the bus honking the whole time. As we got on our driver was already going. And it turned into a race with the other bus. I think the problem was that when the other bus passed them it could then pick up what should be our passengers on the side of the road. Now in a perfect world, each bus would just continue at its pace, and when one pulled over to get passengers the other one would pass it and be in front for the next passengers waiting. But this isn’t a perfect world. Total game theory problem here – kind of a prisoner’s dilemma (man, is grad school ever paying off): it would be best for both buses to go normal speed and each would get some passengers. But if one bus goes fast and the other goes normal speed, the fast bus might make up enough time to never get passed and get all the passengers. So knowing this, both bus drivers go ape-shit and speed. And for an hour it is the scariest ride I have ever been on. Our driver is going about as fast as he can. You can see the intensity of the situation on his face. When we have to pull over to drop people off the porter throws them and their bags out the door while we are still moving! Getting picked up isn’t much safer either! And our bus is tearing around corners (you can feel it skidding) at break neck speeds. When we go through villages the driver doesn’t slow down at all, just keeps the horn down the whole time. We pass the other bus, it passes us and this keeps up for an hour or so. Finally we pass the other bus while going over a bridge and then we slow down. At first I’m not sure why, but then the other bus turns off the road and all is clear. And then it is back to normal just like nothing ever happened. Ye gods.

It was a long 9 hour bus ride. I think that it felt longer because it was the end of the trip and the local travel wasn’t so new and charming anymore. In fact, the karaoke CDs they played were driving me insane the last two hours. And I had to chuckle, as it was the same music that I made a little movie of on our first bus ride from Vientiane at 6am, thinking how funny it was. We finally pulled into the bus station and got off the bus. We grabbed our luggage and a tuk-tuk driver motioned us into his vehicle. Then four Lao people got in and with the bags it was packed. The driver pulled up near the exit and then pulled over to the side and motioned for the Lao people to get out and he put them in another tuk-tuk. And we were thinking he wanted us alone so he could charge us a lot. But then he drives slowly around the bus station. At this point I am about to explode. All I want to do it get to a hotel and drop my stuff off and crack open a Beer Lao. He finally drops us at another tuk-tuk (I managed to keep my cool). Two elderly Lao ladies join us and we are off. And riding into the main part of the city we are sitting ducks for all the people tossing water! We get grazed a few times, and right before we get to our hotel I just get nailed. Now I have to admit getting soaked in a tuk-tuk with your luggage after a long day of traveling isn’t my favorite thing that has ever happened to me. But I manage a Sah Bah Dee Bee Mai and we finally arrive at the Mali Namphu Guesthouse. This is the place we had tried to stay on our first night – but it had been full. They had a room this time – and it was such a cute little place. The LP doesn’t really go out of its way to highlight this place – but it is by far the best guesthouse I have been at in Vientiane. And it was way cheaper than the Day Inn we had stayed at before.

I was so hungry and so excited for dinner. Much like when we pulled into Savannakhet from the hike I felt like a big, fat western dinner. And if you are thinking how many western meals do I need, remember that picture of the crap spaghetti I got! So we decided on L’Opera Italian Restaurant and I am all excited. We are a little wary of getting soaked before we can get to the restaurant, but there is no one throwing water on our street when we walk out. And the restaurant is very close. It is also closed for New Year’s! Fook me. There were five restaurants in the area and the one we wanted was the only one that was closed. Unreal. We had a second choice, Sticky Fingers Café and Bar – but it was a bit of a walk and closer to the Mekong. And I wasn’t sure exactly which side-street it was on, so we decided to walk up to the main road by the Mekong (Th Fa Ngum) and stroll around until we could find it. Of course once we got there, we had to avoid all the water being thrown. People were out and having a grand time, but we didn’t feel like getting soaked before sitting down for dinner. We started going up one side-street, and thought we might get by this group throwing water, but they smiled at us and we turned around and jogged back to the main street. And this is where we ran into the falang who went way overboard. I should mention that people in Vientiane were more aggressive than we had seen in Savannakhet where it was more polite. But these two idiot white boys had plastic garbage cans full of water and were just destroying people. They saw us and started to make a run for us – luckily we saw them coming and ran into a restaurant and waited them out. And I think this is a perfect example of why this festival could never work at home. Can you imagine the violence that a weekend of people dumping water on each other would cause? Combine our rage and the fact that we go overboard with everything and it would be a disaster waiting to happen. Kind of sad. Anyway – after getting away from the falang we headed back in the direction of our hotel and ate at the same place where we had met Ole a little over a week ago. It was decidedly mediocre (I figured that I would be safe and go for a burger – but it tasted like sausage – ugh). I am still waiting for my killer western meal!

Last Day in Vientiane – A Nice Walk, Soaking it All Up on the Banks of the Mekong and One Last New Year’s Wish!
We had one more day in Vientiane as we had a late evening flight home. We walked around the city and enjoyed the last day of the New Year’s celebration. We got hit with water a few times, but had planned ahead and didn’t have any bags with us, so it was fine. Plus it was much warmer out and the water felt pretty good. It was a little crazier in Vientiane – tons of people riding around in the back of pickups and dousing each other. And check out this cute family celebrating! I had wanted to go back to this café we had gone to before for breakfast, but it was closed for New Year’s. Sigh. Instead we ended up eating at a local spot – and I got a baguette sammich – although not a breakfast one, but one with pork and a ton of toppings in it. Other than the pork being a little iffy it was a great sammich. I gotta get these baguette sammich recipes man! We did a little shopping – Margaret got a cool bracelet and I thought I found a cool ring – but it was $125 – I guess I have expensive taste even in Laos! And we go tons of tee-shirts. We also made it to the Patuxai monument - a cool monument, with some good views. It is part of a park and there were tons of people (and military) out. As we were leaving this lady came up to us and doused us with water – it felt so good!

We then slowly headed towards the Mekong, for one last meal and a few last Beer Laos in my favorite spot. We managed to avoid any more water attacks on the way and settled down for a few hours of relaxing. There must have been a big festival down on the Mekong, as it was crowded with people and motorbikes. We stayed at our favorite place though and enjoyed our food, Beer Lao and the atmosphere. Before we knew it, it was time to go. We headed back to the hotel to grab our bags and only got doused once. We got in a tuk-tuk for the airport just after dusk. And had we thought better of it we would have gotten a taxi and not been exposed as our tuk-tuk went through some areas full of people partying. We are in a tuk-tuk at night on the way to the airport with our luggage – you can probably see where this is going. As we head down some main streets there are tons of people out partying. But they seem to have pity on us as no one douses us with water. At one stop light I think we are dead, but the partiers just come over and shake our hands and say Sah Bah Dee Bee Mai and dance in the streets. And then we are outside of town and I think we are fine and Margaret and I smile at each other. But then I see one guy on the road with water and I know it is over. And he just kills me – soaked head to toe – and he got me right on the side of the face so the water basically destroyed my ear drum for a few minutes. I had to chuckle, and continued to chuckle as we got nailed once more before we got to the airport. When our tuk-tuk driver dropped us off we got out and he smiled and said Sah Bah Dee Bee Mai, as did everyone at the airport who saw us soaked from head to toe. We were early for our flight and got through baggage check and customs super early (never been in an airport with more mosquitos – they were everywhere!) so we had time to dry out before our flight. Happy New Year!

Just thought I would end with a quote from the LP that I just love. This is from a Lao person who returned to Laos after being gone for over 20 years: “This is one of the last quiet countries on earth.”

Laos Part II - More Local Travel and a Three Day Trek

I'll have to start with a warning: this part is so long and has so many pictures, even I can't believe it. If I had realized this before I started uploading I would have broken it up differently - but I'm not about ready to reload the pictures. So good luck!

Another Day of Local Travel on the Way to Savannakhet
We were up early again to get on the road. Breakfast at 7am just before the jumbo stopped at Sala Hin Boun to pick us up. It turned out it was the same jumbo as we had taken on the way there. And there were only a couple of other people in it, so the first hour of our journey to Ban Na Hin was quite relaxing. From Ban Na Hin, we had to take another jumbo or bus another hour to the junction. When we got to Ban Na Hin, there was a jumbo just packed full of people waiting to go, and they motioned for us to get on. Margaret really had to use the bathroom, so she went off to the place we had gone before as I paid for our trip and wondered how they were gonna get us on the jumbo. I wasn’t about to get on the jumbo until Margaret got back, although the driver (and passengers) seemed a bit antsy. Margaret came back, but told me the place wasn’t open yet, so she wasn’t able to use the bathroom. So the lady collecting money takes her a different direction and the people seem even antsier. Margaret comes back with the same news, the place was locked and she couldn’t get in. So now we get in the jumbo, and we are sitting on a wooden bench in the middle of the jumbo – and it is almost an impossible fit, especially for my legs.

And after all that antsy-ness, when we get on the jumbo it goes about 50 feet and stops to load up luggage and get more people. Sigh.

It was a long, windy trip through the mountains, but an hour later we are at the junction, where we have to wait for a bus coming through on the way to Savannakhet. We get out of the jumbo and our stuff is unloaded – you can see how packed it actually was in these pictures. We notice a bus on the side of the road heading the way we want to go, but we have to make a bathroom stop and by the time we come out, the bus has gone. So we shop for some food for the rest of our trip and check out the junction. We wander around and are on the wrong side of the road resting with a coffee when the second bus comes barreling through town, but as we run out to flag it down, it just keeps motoring. And I knew the driver had seen me, so I thought it was kind of weird. We head back over to be on the right side of the road and about twenty minutes later another bus comes by. And we see that it is a bus to Savannakhet and wave our arms. It goes past us and then pulls over and the porter gets out and motions for us to hurry up. So we run up to it, along with a Lao woman. And the bus is completely packed. The porter packs the Lao woman in but shrugs his shoulders at us as there is no room for us with our big ass backpacks. So away goes the third bus. But at least we know why the second bus didn’t stop.

Finally we are able to get on the fourth bus that comes by. It stops and again we run towards it, and it is also completely full, but the porter jumps on top of the bus and we hand our luggage to him and jump on. And this bus is so full it makes the bus we took from Vientiane seem like a luxury bus. I think the bus could sit around 50 people, and there are somewhere near 100 people on it. We are standing in the aisle in the first row. At one point there were 18 people crammed in the front of the bus. Here are a couple of pictures, although the angles don’t really show how crowded it was. The “can do” attitude of the Lao bus porters is quite amazing, but it is hard not to think about what would happen if the bus got in an accident. And it is just a mess when people from the back of the bus need to get out. They usually announce it ahead of time, and their luggage is passed up person to person. The bus stops and the people getting off climb over seats and people to get out. Once again there is pushing, shoving and confusion, but it isn’t aggressive and again it seems like it is just all in a day to the Lao people – there really isn’t any frustration, or at least none is shown.

When we get to Tha Khaek there is actually a bus station, and our bus pulls in and everyone piles off. Some people are off for good, others just to use the bathroom and grab some food. We stop for about a half an hour. When the driver gets back on, we do as well. All of the seats aren’t taken, but it is hard to tell if they are open or not (once you have a seat, it is yours until the ride is over – you can’t lose it at a stop). So Margaret and I stand in the aisle sort of not knowing what to do as others get on the bus. And older lady near the front motions for Margaret that the seat next to her is empty so she sits there. And I just stand in the aisle next to Margaret until the porter grabs my arm and leads me to an open seat (of course on the way I smash my head on a light hanging from the ceiling, to the delight of everyone who sees it). So at least we both get seats this time, although about half the bus away from each other. Margaret took a picture of me – sort of funny – can you tell who doesn’t belong? Having seats made the rest of the journey so much better. As we go further, more and more people get off, and finally Margaret and I can sit together and there isn’t anyone standing for the last hour or so. We pull into the Savannakhet bus station about 3:30pm, although it feels like such a long day of traveling.

And the day isn’t over yet. We went to Savannakhet because we wanted to do some trekking in the Dong Phu Vieng National Protected Area, as it was highly recommended by the LP and sounded like an amazing experience. We get in a tuk-tuk and head to the Provincial Tourism Office, which is the only place you can book the treks through. Our tuk-tuk driver doesn’t know what we are talking about, so we just have him drop us by the banks of the Mekong and walk to the Tourism Office. We get there before they close and set up a three day trek beginning the next day (no rest for the weary!). The trek is really expensive and about twice as much as quoted in the LP, but our book is two years old and things change. We really hope it is gonna be worth it. The woman we booked the trip with, Nik gives us some of the highlights, rules and tells us the things we will need. She tells us we will have two guides (one of them being her!) from Savannakhet, and then when we get to the National Protected Area we will in addition have two local guides every day. As we leave the Tourism Office to look for a hotel we are full of excitement for the trip.

But we are also drained from the day, and just want to get a room, drop our stuff and take a shower. We walk about 20 minutes to a hotel we saw on the way in and that was mentioned by the LP. The owner tells us they only have one room with four beds left and he won’t discount the price. So we head off and try the next guesthouse. This lobby in this one smells like a mixture of smoke, urine and failure and I am kind of glad when they say they are full. So we jump in a tuk-tuk and head to a couple of budget hotels listed in the LP, but they are both very budget and we feel like we need a good night’s sleep before three days trekking and staying in villages. Finally we move up to the more expensive hotels (again by Lao standards) and decide on the Nanhai Hotel. We get there and the room is nothing special but by this time we are too frustrated to keep on going so we decide to stay there. The LP says the Nanhai Hotel has “semi-luxurious rooms with decent views, but has something of a character bypass.” Well, the LP was right about the character bypass, but there was nothing even remotely semi-luxurious about our room and the view from our window was of a rusted tin rooftop. But the rooms did have AC, we got a good night’s sleep and the staff was super friendly.

We left to go grab some food and get a few things and it struck us that our hotel looked like a six-storey ghost town. Check it out. It almost does have character because of the utter lack of character, if that makes any sense. So we grab a quick dinner, exchange money to get more kip (we did that at a local pharmacy!), shop at a local market and get some supplies for the trip. Then we head back to the Nanhai and it is all lit up! Maybe not so pretty, but not a ghost town anymore. We chuckle as we head in, wondering how this hotel can do any business. It is another early night.

Trek Day 1 – Nik and Dar, Fried Cicadas, the Johnny Walker Truck, a Buggy Lunch and Ban Wong See Gao (where the Women are Stronger than the Men)
We had learned from Nik the day before at the Tourism Office that our Day 1 would consist of a 4 hour jumbo ride (not chartered, a local one – so it would pick up and drop off people along the way) and then an 8km trek to the village we would stay at for the night. Ahh, more traveling. We were wondering if maybe we should have taken a day off before we got started, but we still weren’t sure what we were going to do afterwards and didn’t want to “waste” any time.

As we had gone to bed early, the morning wake up call wasn’t so bad. We went down for breakfast at our wonderful hotel, and there were no customers in the restaurant. One of the waiters motioned for us to sit at a table, and there were two plates of food there already. Now it was the usual “breakfast included” of coffee and a baguette with cheese, but Margaret’s had sausage with it. So we thought that someone else must have ordered this, so we asked the waiter. And she doesn’t understand us, so she motions for another waiter to come over and we ask him. And he is so nervous to speak (in English) that he totally clears his throat and gulps before telling us this is our breakfast. And then he was pretty proud of himself – it was really funny.

Nik had told us that either she or our other guide would pick us up in a tuk-tuk. And we see a tuk-tuk pull up and we head outside and meet Dar, our second guide. On the way to the Tourism Office, we learn that Dar is 23 and just started a few months ago as a guide after finishing training. I think training consisted mostly of a crash course in English, and it was pretty phenomenal how good he was after only a few months. Now I’m not saying their (Nik and Dar) English was perfect, and there were many times that we had to go over and over things until we understood what they were saying – but it was quite impressive for the amount of time they had been studying – and they were constantly teaching themselves phrases, words and asking our help. We get to the Tourism Office, where we are supposed to drop off the luggage we aren’t taking and meet up with Nik. We decide to take one big backpack and one small one, but when Nik sees what we have she tells us we won’t want a big one. So we repack what we can into two small backpacks (thank god we did) and leave the two big backpacks. And then we jump on our jumbo and it is time to begin!

Our jumbo ride was relaxing and fun. We basically headed four hours straight east from Savannakhet (towards the Vietnam border). When we started it was just the four of us and Nik and Dar pointed out and explained many things along the way. And this was how the whole trip would go – they really had to know a lot and explain a lot in English. It was hard to understand them sometimes over the noise of the jumbo, but after a few repeats, hand motions, etc. usually either Margaret or I understood. It didn’t stay the four of us for very long as we started picking people up on the way, but the jumbo never got super crowded and it was a really nice ride. Nik and Dar got a lot of food for us to try at the different villages we stopped at. We had these yummy corn paste things, sticky rice (which was going to be the staple of our diet for the next three days) and BBQ corn. And just about everything you can imagine on a stick: corn, chicken, eggs and bugs – including cicadas! Although I have to admit that neither Margaret nor I tried the cicadas - I almost did, but chickened out at the last minute. The food is so cheap that you don’t get one of anything. For instance, if you buy some BBQ corn on the cob, you have to get three cobs. So we offered a lot of the food we didn’t eat around the jumbo, and this one elderly man took some of everything offered. He was really funny – and asked us a few questions through Nik and Dar. He knew some French from back in the day but no English. Dar told us he said that he thinks is it good for the Lao to learn English and that it is better than French. But that is because he equates French with soldiers and English with tourists.

We arrived at a small village in the Phin (“Pin”) District, near the Dong Phu Vieng National Protected Area (DPV NPA). We went to the local market where Nik and Dar picked up food and supplies for the hike. Margaret and I walked around the market and most everybody was staring at us. We heard “falang” a lot and it didn’t seem that people there were that used to foreigners, although they were all very nice. It was a pretty desolate and poor village, and the market reflected that. And then it was time to head into the DPV NPA and begin our trek. Our local driver was a one-eyed guy who had a black pick-up that had Johnny Walker decals all over it. It was just too funny (Johnny Walker is very popular in Laos for some reason). Anyway, Margaret and I were told to ride up front in the cab, as we would be going on dirt roads and it is quite dusty, so we did as we were told. The ride was about 45 minutes and then “Johnny Walker” dropped us off at the trail head.

We were met at the trail head by our two local guides (from the village we were hiking to) “Alloy” (pictured below) and “Ahsee”. Of course this is just my attempt at spelling their names how they sounded. We walked for a whole 10 minutes and then stopped for lunch, and it was crazy buggy. As soon as we stopped there were bugs everywhere. At first we were a little freaked because we thought they were mosquitos, but they were just some sort of small fly or gnat – no big deal but super annoying. Dar and Nik spread leaves on the ground and then put out our lunch spread. And we would be eating pretty basic food for the next few days, the staple being sticky rice. Which makes sense as sticky rice is the staple of Lao diets, both for ethnic Lao and the minority villagers. Besides the sticky rice (which you eat with your hands – actually you do with all the food – Lao people eat with their hands and sit on the floor) we had chicken, greens, papaya salad, noodles and some chocolate wafer bars for dessert! After lunch we had twenty minutes to rest, but the bugs were so bad that we rested by walking around. At this point I was a little frustrated and hoping the whole hike wasn’t going to be like this.

It wasn’t. After we walked a little bit the bugs were gone and things got much better. We hiked for 8km through the forest, and while the scenery wasn’t anything spectacular, we sure did learn a lot. Nik and Dar stopped us many times to point out different trees or plants and let us know how the villagers used them. They also had to local guides stop at certain times and point out things to us – which Nik and Dar translated. The Katang villagers have their own language, but many of them also know some Lao (and Nik and Dar know some of the local Katang language). Nik and Dar also told us many legends and stories as we passed by things, only a few of which I remember – and not sure I even remember those correctly! A few of the things we saw and learned: so many ant nests and ants everywhere (I believe the villagers eat ants); a leaf that is used to heal a bad stomach (it is boiled in water) and also used for a wrap for tobacco; a leaf that is wiped on skin for insect repellent; a plant that is used as a broom; a plant called sleeping leaves because when you touch it the leaves shrivel up (it is really cool); bug wings that are used as fake fingernails and decorations for rice baskets and other things (we brought some back to put in our scrapbook – not on my fingernails); and this plant that has a sort of lollipop looking stem/leaf the outside of which is used for a kids game and the inside stone-like substance is used as “buffalo medicine.” Nik laughed and told us that if we saw a sick buffalo on the way we would now know what to do!

About halfway through the trek we see our guides quickly run over to a spot and we follow to see what they are doing. Alloy is poking a stick in a hole in the ground, and Ahsee is waiting at another hole (the other end of the tunnel). A lizard pops out and Ahsee grabs it immediately. The lizard is quite striking with a bright orange flank, and Ahsee puts it in his pocket (alive) and I imagine it is gonna be for dinner! Near the village we stop to rest at a little pond, and another villager is around and he brings us some small oranges that are quite delicious. It is a perfect resting spot. We got to the village, Ban Wong See Gao, about 4:30pm. Nik told us the story of the name of the village although I’m not sure I have it exactly right. But the Wong is a Chinese man who either married (or had an affair) with a Vietnamese woman (Gao means Vietnamese or something to that effect) – so that is how the village got its name. As we walk into the village the first things that are apparent are that it is dry, dusty, primitive and poor. You can see the poverty all around. We walk through the village and everyone is very interested in us, especially the kids. But again, it is a very shy interest. No on is running up to us and touching us or anything. We come upon a woman pounding rice, and it looks like hard work. In fact, Nik and Dar tell us that the women in the village are stronger than the men because of all the labor intensive jobs they have to do like pounding rice. We watch her for a little bit and a lot of kids come to watch us – you can see the shy interest in this picture. The have big smiles, but they keep their distance. Even the adults are very shy and timid. Margaret also took a turn at pounding the rice. In order to keep with village tradition, I did not. Before I continue the story, here is a little information on the Katang villagers (much from the LP). The Katang villagers believe in a variety of spirits that surround them in the forest. Each village home has a house spirit, and it is very important not to disturb this spirit. Each home has a shrine to the house spirit, and from what we could tell it consisted of 4 separate cups of water. Anyway, there are certain rules that must be followed by visitors, when staying in a Katang village home. If a rule is broken, a meeting must be held in order to decide how the spirit can be mollified. Usually a sacrifice is made – don’t worry, not a human one. But sometimes it can call for a buffalo to be sacrificed, and as the villagers are quite poor this can have a dire impact on them so it is prudent of a visitor to follow the rules. Here is a list of rules from the LP that we verified: never enter the owner’s bedroom or touch the spirit place; do not sleep beside a person of the opposite sex, even if you are married! (although of course the villagers that are married can sleep next to each other – just not visitors); do sleep with your head pointed toward the nearest outside wall and never point your feet at the outside wall; do not bang on the walls of the house; and never clap your hands in a house without getting the owner’s permission first (you can clap outside all you want). So you can see that you need to pay attention to your actions so you don’t all of a sudden clap without thinking about it. It seems as if some of the rules and customs are relaxed a little for foreigners. For instance, it was stressed to never point your feet at someone else, but many people did while sitting, which was good for me because I can’t sit cross-legged for a long time.

The Katang villagers have their own language although it is only an oral language, there is no written language. There is a story about how the Katang written language was “lost” that I don’t remember exactly but it goes something like this: the Katang language was carved into trees (or wood) and perished in a fire, while the Lao language was carved into stone and therefore still around. I may have the surfaces and means of destruction mixed up, but it is something like that. We learned a few phrases including “Ban Scha-wahn” (Hello) and “Em” (Yummy). The villagers (especially our local guides) taught us many more, but those are the only two I still remember.

As we walked through the village we noticed a sign describing a Canadian sponsored project.

Nik and Dar translated the sign and it basically listed what the project provided. For instance: a school; 3.61 hectares of land; a bathroom facility; a road (to connect the villages); a maternity house; 20 buffalo, 41 goats, etc. The variety of things from the project was quite interesting. As we continued through the village we met the Village Chief, and he invited us to his home to see his newborn child. So we go to the chief’s house (all the village houses are raised on stilts) and meet his 22 day old child (his seventh) and Margaret gets to hold him! The Chief tells us that as Village Chief he needs to have 9 children. He has been Chief for 4 years and I guess there is a new chief (or at least elections) every four years. The Chief is very timid and gentle and through Dar and Nik we have a little question and answer session.

It turns out the Chief first saw “falang” in 2000, when the Canadian project started. This just stuns me. I keep thinking that my first visit to SE Asia was to Vietnam in 2000 – so while I was touring around ‘Nam, these villagers were seeing their first foreigner EVER! The Chief told us that they have had trekkers for three years now, and when the first trekkers came most of the villagers fled to the woods! But now they like “falang” although they are still quite shy. And part of the trekking fee we paid goes to each village we stop in. The Chief says they usually get 2-3 groups (2-8 people per group) every month. We also found out that our local guides only get paid with meals on the trek (other than tips of course).

After our chat we go to our host Mr. Kapon’s house. His house is like most in the village: two raised structures (the main house and a kitchen) connected by a raised platform. Here is the main house and inside. Here is the kitchen and inside. Also inside the kitchen they have caterpillars and keep the wool from them. Mr. Kapon and his family greet us and we sit inside the house and relax. We then decide it is time to freshen up and we head to the village’s water pump. Some kids follow us and are not shy at all about watching us bathe. It is a little uncomfortable, but funny too. The only rule is that women have to be covered by a sarong. We also see the school house and the maternity house. Before the maternity house was built by the Canadian project, the villagers would give birth in the forest. They have been convinced that a maternity house is ok with the spirits.

Dinner is prepared for us

as we relax with our host and his family and some other villagers that drop by. And again they are very interested, but really shy. In fact the only one who wasn’t shy was Mr. Kapon’s grandson who walked right over to us and seemed to be just fine! When dinner was served we ate with Nik and Dar, but the family and the rest of the villagers (including the Village Chief) just watched us even though there was food for them as well. The Chief said they were too shy and for us to go ahead and eat. I’m not sure if they were really too shy, or if this is custom to have your visitors eat first. It was pretty weird though. After we finished, the villagers ate. And then we had a question and answer period for about an hour and a half. Dar was the interpreter, as Nik was tired and fell asleep! But it was a really interesting hour and a half. The villagers were very interested in our customs for marriage, weddings, etc. They laughed as we told them and then explained theirs. Katang men can have two wives, although not all of them do. The man must offer gifts to the woman’s family in order to marry her. And he must weave a mat for her! We joked with Dar that he must weave a mat for Nik. There is also a weird custom (to us) where when a boy is interested in a girl, he can’t come into her parent’s house. He must use a stick and poke her through a gap in the floor of the house to let her know he wants to talk to her. Then she can go with him (with supervision) to the forest and they can talk. Oh – and when a couple gets married the woman goes to live at the man’s house. So you end up with many generations under one roof.

The villagers were also interested in what type of wildlife we had in our countries. And I think they liked Margaret right away as she was Canadian and they were very appreciative of what the Canadian project had provided for them. They asked us if we had big cows in our country or small ones like we saw around the village. When we told them that we had big cows and tried to explain how big I think they were amazed. One of the villagers said they would like to have our big cows. One of the most interesting questions asked was whether we had poor people like them in our countries. And it was really tough to answer – to let them know that we do have lots of poverty and poor people. And it was really hard to describe how many of our poor people are homeless – I just don’t think they got that. They are so poor, yet the villagers are very family oriented – there isn’t such a thing as a homeless person. I think they thought we were pretty strange. The Chief ended the evening by saying that everyone looked tired and he thanked us for chatting with them. We thanked them as well, and then it was time for bed. As it turned out Nik and Margaret would sleep in or host’s house and Dar and I would sleep at a neighbor’s house. So we said goodnight and got our torches (it was completely dark) and headed to the neighbors house, got under the mosquito net and called it a night. An amazing day.

Trek Day 2 – Looking for the Sacred Monkeys, Popcorn Butterflies, a Popular Thai Song and a Baci Ceremony
We woke up really early (as in before 6am early) to try and see the sacred monkeys. We had another local guide take us into the sacred forest and we walked around for 45 minutes. One has to be lucky to see the monkeys as they aren’t always there (and it is considered good luck as the monkeys are considered sacred by the Katang and they are not hunted). And it appeared that we weren’t going to be lucky, but then our guide spotted a few and we were able to see three of them, but just barely as they were high up in the treetops and are scared of humans so stay very still. As we walked around we heard some more but didn’t see any more, even though Margaret was good about reminding us to be quiet. Our guide told us that sometimes there are hundreds of them jumping around the treetops. Here is Margaret with the monkey guide. Dar asks the guide to show us a marker for the dead on the way back. So our guide takes us by a marker for a villager that recently died. It actually turns out that it was our guide’s mother who had passed away. The markers are part of an interesting ritual and belief. It is not a burial marker, as the Katang bury their dead in the forest. But after a person is buried, their spirit will come to someone in a dream and tell that person what kind of marker the spirit needs and where it should be. The spirit will also tell that person what kind of tools the spirit needs. Then the villagers will build the marker where and how it is supposed to be and they will make tools and other items that the spirit requested. If no one has a dream of the spirit or the villagers don’t do what the spirit says, then the spirit cannot rest. Our local guide told us that it was his brother-in-law who had the dream of his mother’s spirit.

We hike back to the village and go back to Mr. Kapon’s house for breakfast. Nik has cooked us up some great soup along with some eggs and coffee. And Mr. Kapon, a few of his friends and our 2 new local guides eat breakfast with us, as I guess they have gotten over their shyness. We leave the village with our two new guides, “Moon Young” and “Bouillon” (who are brothers) stopping by the house I slept in to say thanks. And the kids there are full of laughter – so cute. There are two sides to the village, and we walk through the other side of the village on our way out, and come across some kids playing a game. Most of them scramble inside when they see us, but a few still play. For some reason I picked up some baskets. And we got the best picture of those kids who went inside (like the best picture ever). Our second day was an 18km trek – so not as easy as day one. It was much of the same type of forest scenery, although a little more mountainous. Dar, Nik, Moon Young and Bouillon provided us with a ton more information and a few more legends and stories. We again came across the plant that is used for healing a bad stomach as well as for wrappers for tobacco – and we tried a few puffs this time (yes, it is just tobacco). We saw a sort of popcorn like caterpillar – they are white and bunched up on branches and leaves and all of them jump when touched so it kind of looks like popcorn being popped. Our guides also show us how they burn trees to extract oil. And Nik makes some beautiful jewelry for Margaret! One of our rest stops is coffin cave. The legend here (again I may not have it exactly right) is that man and animals used to be giants. So when someone died they would raise them up in the trees so the animals couldn’t get to them. Once the body decomposed and only bones were left the people would put the bones in a coffin. Then the coffin was put inside the cave. This is part of a local Katang theory or legend that people and animals and trees, etc. used to be giant sized and each generation we get smaller and smaller. At another rest stop our guides teach us a local game and we try it. Margaret was pretty good, but she was no match for Bouillon (neither was I). We stop for lunch – and again enjoy sticky rice with various meat and veggies. And notice the smoke from the fire in the background of the picture - on our hike we were startled just about to death when Moon-Young and Bouillon saw a bird and tried to grab it quickly. The bird flew off in a burst of noise and feathers (which is what startled us - we had no idea they were even after something) and it left behind eggs in its nest. So the guides took the eggs and cooked them up for lunch! In the afternoon we actually see some UXO on the trail. At first I thought that maybe it was planted there. Like maybe it was UXO but had been deemed safe and was put on the trail so that they could point it out and talk about it. But Nik and Dar didn’t say much about it (maybe they were afraid of embarrassing me, I don’t know) and when one of our local guides started to go near it Dar and Nik yelled at him not to touch it and everyone seemed a little tense. Our last rest stop of the day was by two rocks that told a story. The rock formation looked like a Rhinoceros and a Cobra (ok, it sort of did and somehow I didn’t take a picture) – and Nik told us the story. It was funny because she asked us to guess what the rocks looked like and we were completely wrong. And she didn’t quite get Rhinoceros correct (I don’t think I do either) but we knew what she meant. But the second rock she called a “corba” and it was a second before we realized that she meant cobra. And I’m not making fun of her (although it was funny) but just pointing out how we sometimes had to go over and over things to understand. Ok – I know I don’t have this story correct – but it is something like this: all of the animals were supposed to meet up in the sky so at a certain time they would be lifted up. Well the Rhino and Cobra were too late and while they were being raised up time ran out and they fell back to earth and hit at that spot and died.

One other thing about the hike – Dar had mentioned that they sometimes have Japanese tourists, so Margaret said a few things in Japanese and Dar was all excited. For the next two days Margaret taught him some Japanese words and sayings (and wrote some words down in his book, like we did for some English words). I think Margaret taught Dar more Japanese than English. Here are the English words they asked us to write down (the ones I remember anyway): camouflage, axe and gnat. Dar also really loved the saying “that’s cool.”

We arrived at the village, Ban Yang, in the late afternoon. Again, we walked by some women pounding rice. I forgot to mention before that the villagers are up really, really early – sometime after 4am to pound rice before it gets too hot. So not only is it a physically demanding job for the women, they have to get up before dawn each day! No thanks. So the women pound rice in the early morning and the late afternoon until dusk. We head to our host Mr. Kamsai’s house. Just before we got to his house we saw this girl pounding rice. Now tell me that looks easy.Dar then decided that he would give it a go. I think the little girl was just happy to have a break!Ok - back to Mr. Kamsai's house - the houses in this village are also on stilts and use leaves for walls (kitchen on the left and living quarters on the right). It seems that this village is a little better off than Ban Wong See Gao and I’m not sure why, but maybe because they are so close to the river. Anyway – our host seems to have more stuff – plates and other dinnerware, etc. He even has a parrot! The village also has a solar panel, which I assume is from the Canadian project. And yep, you know this is coming: the villagers of Ban Yang are more familiar with alternative energy sources than most Americans. Zing!

Then it was time to head down to the river (about 1km away) for a bath. We walked through the village - here are a few pictures.When we got to the end of the village these four boys started to follow us down to the river. We had been sort of singing this popular Thai song with Dar and Nik and these kids heard us and they knew it and started singing it too! Now calling it singing might be a stretch – as the song chorus is basically nonsense but goes something like: “Da jai da da, da da jai da da, WHOO!, da jai da da, da da jai da da, WHOO!” Anyway we’d sing it and then they would, with the WHOO’s getting louder every time. It was hilarious and the kids were absolutely the funniest. We got down to the river and it felt so good to get cleaned up. Again, some villagers had no problem just watching us, which felt weird again. And Margaret can tell you how tough it is to take a bath in the river with a sarong on! When we finished and got out of the water the sun was going down and it was getting chilly. We got back to the village just before sunset and we got to relax while Nik and some of Mr. Kamsai's family prepared dinner.Then we had dinner with Mr. Kamsai and his family and friends. It was now time for the Baci Ceremony, which one of the two villages you visit performs. The Baci Ceremony is basically to welcome you to the village and to have the spirits protect you. From the LP: “A ceremony in which the 32 khwan (or spirits) are symbolically bound to the participant for health and safety.” The ceremony was for Margaret, myself, Dar and Nik and we were surrounded by the villagers performing the ceremony. The first step was to have some chicken and shots of Lao Lao (again, the strong Lao homemade whiskey)! Then one by one they tied white strings on our wrists, which I think is the symbolic binding of the spirits. When they did this you held your arm that was not being bound up in the air with your elbow bent and near your ear and the person next to you should be touching you. It was a fascinating experience and I loved having the strings tied around my wrist (I kept them on for over a week). I think we had 8 or so strings tied around us, each by a different person who would tell you something – a welcome to the village or a wish for the spirits to protect you on your travels, etc.

Then it was time for music and dancing. We went outside the house and sat down in a circle on a mat with a few of the villagers. Many of the other villagers stood around us. And then the villagers on the mat with us played a local instrument and sang traditional songs. It was so cool. Dar and Nik each sang a song and then it was our turn! And Margaret and I were stumped. Each song one of us mentioned, the other one didn’t know. And I didn’t figure any of the songs I know every word to (that would be any number of Gn’R songs and Young MC’s “Bust a Move”) were appropriate. So we ended up singing “You Are My Sunshine.” Yeah, I know, kind of weak. Then there was more singing and then dancing! We basically got up and danced in a circle, while the villagers surrounding us laughed. Margaret had some great fun with the kids as she would boogie and they would yell and then show off their best dance moves. One little kid in particular was funny and seemed quite daring. But when we saw him the next day we laughed and said we know that’s you from last night and he got shy and ran off. Oh – and they used a little head-lamp for light (the battery for which was charged by the solar panel!). So during the singing one guy had the instrument, one guy was singing and one guy had the torch helmet on! After the dancing we thanked the villagers and they left and we went back inside.

Just like the night before we had a little discussion with some of the villagers. They told us that they had heard yesterday that we were in Ban Wong See Gao and they were excited for us to visit them. They then told us that they like foreigners, as tourists are “good unlike soldiers.” Then it was time for bed. This time Margaret and I got to sleep in the same house, although again I slept with Dar and Margaret slept with Nik. Another amazing day.

Trek Day 3 – Condensed Milk, More Johnny Walker, a Full Jumbo Ride Home and a Disappointing Dinner
Day three of the trek was going to be much easier as we had a short hike, a boat ride and then the ride home. We woke up and had breakfast with our host family (cooked again by Nik and our host family). The grandfather sat by me and we chatted a little bit with help from Dar, and he told Dar that he wished I spoke his language so we could speak more. We all had coffee, and Mr. Kamsai, his father and his son (I think) just kept pouring in the condensed milk. They aren’t used to having coffee and it is way too strong for them, but it was ridiculous – the whole can was almost used up. And then the grandfather takes a sip of his and reaches for the condensed milk and pours more in. It was too funny. The one who I think was Mr. Kamsai’s son seems really smart – every once in awhile he understands what we are saying and pops in an English expression. And he is right on. Margaret begins to put jelly on her toast and everyone is looking at her. So she offers it to the granddaughter who takes some. Then Margaret is putting jam on toast for everyone. And the one who loves it the most is the baby grandson, who is about the cutest (yes I realize I have said that about 100 kids by now). By the end of breakfast this kid is overloaded on jam. After breakfast it is time to leave and we get pictures of and with the whole family.How's this for some thread?Our trek today is only 6km and pretty uneventful. We also didn’t have to bring our packs today as our boat driver took them (and would meet up with us later). At the beginning of the trek we see some kids out working and Margaret goes to give them some candy. We also get to see another coffin cave, this one with a coffin. Kind of eerie. In no time at all our new guides (I didn’t write down their names) have us to the river (I think it is the Se Pan River or an offshoot). There we met up with our boat and two boat guides (didn’t write their names down either) and said goodbye to our trekking guides. The boat trip was only and hour or so and quite relaxing. We only had to get out once, when the boat guides had to get the boat over the rapids. Also – here is a Lao sign on a rock that we saw many times – it says something like “keep our forests” – I think it is more of an anti-development thing than an anti-litter slogan. And speaking of litter, it is one thing that is quite noticeable and unsightly in Laos. In the minority villages there is litter everywhere – I mean just everywhere. And maybe that is understandable in some ways, as there probably isn’t much of a garbage removal system. But even in the main cities there is litter everywhere. And again you can see it everywhere when you are traveling – just everywhere along the road and all over in the villages you pass through. It is unfortunate.

Our boat trip ends at a sort of scenic picnic area that includes a bunch of little huts. Dar and Nik tell us that it is a party place for the Lao. We are the only ones there when we arrive and settle down in a hut for lunch. After lunch we get about 20 minutes to relax and check out the views. And a few Lao people arrive, and then a few more and then a lot more. They all seem quite surprised by us. Dar and Nik tell us that they are arriving to celebrate the Lao New Year (much more on this in the next blog – the best New Year’s celebration ever!) and will stay and party all weekend. And then we see the Johnny Walker truck and it is time to start the trip home. This time we braved the back of the truck and all the dust. Margaret did wear a mask though, and this picture just cracks me up – I swear she looks like a terrorist fleeing the scene.Somehow one of us does the "Happy Gilmore" thumbs down with "thhhhhhhpt" sound to something someone said (yes, Vegas Five I am still doing this). And Dar and Nik think it is hilarious. And they keep doing it. At first we wonder if they get how it is used sarcastically - but Nik gets our attention and says she thinks Dar is really handsome. And the gives the thumbs down with "thhhhhhhhpt." God it was funny. So they definitely got it. They also thought Margaret's monkey sounds and my Donald Duck imitation were funny. So the whole way home was basically a mixture of these three things. Ye gods.

As we are getting close to the town in Phin district where we will catch a jumbo, there is a jumbo waiting for us by the side of the road. The truck stops and the jumbo driver tries to get us to get in, but Dar and Nik wave him off and we continue towards the town. Basically there were a couple of jumbos ready to go and they knew we were coming and both wanted us to ride with them – so this enterprising driver decided to meet us early and see if he could steal us! We arrive in town and after a few minutes to relax (and let the jumbo drivers fight it out) we jump in the jumbo (it turned out to be the one that met us early) and start the journey back to Savannakhet. In the beginning we are the only ones in the jumbo and it is smooth sailing and we are all relaxing or sleeping. But it wouldn’t stay that way.

After about an hour we picked up a few people, but it was still pretty comfortable. But then we pull over for this guy in a Hawaiian shirt – and he talks to the driver for a bit. Then he gets in and our jumbo turns around! We turn off on a dirt road and drive in for about 10 minutes, when we come upon a group of men working near the forest (they were forest service workers). And we sit there and wait about 10 minutes for them to stop working, get their stuff and get on the jumbo. It turns out they had sent their friend to go wait by the road and flag down the jumbo and take it to them. And they weren’t even ready when we arrived! We asked the guy in the Hawaiian shirt why he had to wait for the jumbo and he smiled a little timidly and said his friends “picked him.” He was definitely the group’s beeeeoooooootch. It gets better. So we finally start back driving towards the main road and after about 5 minutes a motorcycle comes out of nowhere honking like crazy. We pull over and the guy on the bike gets out and tells the guys in the jumbo something and they all look crestfallen and start filing out of the jumbo. We ask Dar what is going on and he says the guy on the motorbike told them that their boss decided to drop by and they have to go back and wait for him. It was so depressing for these guys, because they were trying to get out of there early and head home for the big New Year’s weekend. Most of the guys were standing around talking as we pulled away (our jumbo driver wasn’t about to drive them back after they had wasted ½ hour of his time) but there was one guy already walking back with his shoulders slumped and his head down. We felt so badly for him. Once again, the Man keeping us down!

For us it wasn’t that bad though as we went from what would have been a pretty full jumbo to almost empty again. But of course that wouldn’t last. We drove off the main road again and into a salt mine area. This must have been pre-arranged. Anyway we stop off at this guy’s house and of course they aren’t ready. So they close up house, which included nailing things shut and then start loading up the jumbo. They start loading bags on top – it turns out they were bags of wood and charcoal – this family (a man and wife, their two kids and 4-5 other various hangers-on) was gonna have a serious New Year’s celebration. Then they load TWO motorbikes INSIDE the jumbo. This did not make me happy. And last they loaded their TV on the top! So funny. They told us they were going to their parents for New Years (and of course how can you visit your parents for the weekend and not bring your TV?). So now we were pretty full. And this stop took at least 45 minutes. More and more people kept getting on. At one point we had this count: 15 people, 2 motorbikes, 1 parrot, 10 bags charcoal, 10 bags wood, 14 coconuts and a TV. You just can’t top that. Just to make things a bit longer, a little while later the driver stopped and picked up a baby from this woman. Seriously she just handed him the baby and he put the baby on his lap and kept going. About 5 minutes later he turned around and went back and the lady got on board too. Don’t ask – no idea.

So it turned out to be a long ride home. Dar was getting quite upset at all the setbacks, as he had plans for the evening and his friends kept calling him. I think he is the only Lao person I have ever seen show frustration. When we finally got back and were dropped off at the Tourism Office it was dark out. We grabbed our stuff from the office and then it was time for goodbyes – which was quite sad. Dar and Nik are great guides and great fun and we miss them. Nik called us a tuk-tuk and we jumped in and took off. We were heading to a different hotel than the ghost town hotel from before and we hoped they had rooms available. We got to the Phonepaseut Hotel and they did have rooms and it was so much better than the ghost town hotel and the same price. Cool and the gang.

We were tired but needed to go get some food. We decided against the restaurant at our hotel as there was no one inside. I chose Le Café Paris from the LP as I really wanted some western food. It had moved from where it used to be (we had seen the old one all boarded up) so we got in a tuk-tuk and asked him to take us there. It was questionable if he understood us or not, and of course he didn’t as he dropped us at Lao-Paris Restaurant. At this point we just decided to give up and eat there as we were tired and hungry. Margaret ordered some Lao type dishes (although not sticky rice) and I decided on the spaghetti with cheese. By the looks of the menu I was a little afraid, but I didn’t realize how afraid I should have been. This is what my spaghetti looked like. It was awful – I had two bites and felt sick. It tasted like soggy noodles with warm salsa. Ugh. And I was so hungry and so craving some good western food. To say that I was disappointed would be a tad of an understatement. After “dinner” we walked around a bit and got some snacks and beer. Beer Lao of course – one big bottle and I noticed they had small bottles of Beer Lao Dark so I had to get one of those as well. When we got back to the hotel room there wasn’t a bottle opener. And the Beer Lao bottles are capped tightly! I couldn’t open it with the old surface/slap trick and neither could Margaret (who is actually really good at it and taught me how to do it). When I drew blood I decided that Beer Lao wasn’t to be for me that night. Sigh.

And holy crap if you made it through that you deserve a friggin' medal. I can promise that Part III will be much shorter, and the last part!